I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
