i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize