The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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