I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
We had to coat check the pizza.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
