Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
