I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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