Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
