Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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