We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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