I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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