garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize