never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
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