I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Randomize