Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
