sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize