My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
