life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Just puked most of my soul out..
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