# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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