Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Randomize
