You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
