STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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