I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
