there were more penises there than on chat roulette
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
