she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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