She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize