I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I'd cum for enchiladas.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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