so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
