Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
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