I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
