so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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