hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
