how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
