Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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