My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize