He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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