I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
