lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
She just used a chaser for red wine.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
