I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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