i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
