I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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