This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
