She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
last night I used snow as a chaser
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
