i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
