we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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