We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
the day after is always just damage control
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
