you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
