She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
