do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
