I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
