you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I have grass duct taped all over my body
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
