Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
