Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
