oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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